Tunica: Thus is Life. Sigh.

So after I talked such a big game to my beginner friend Caitlin, wouldn't you know the road KICKED MY ASS this morning. Here I am giving advice and pointers about shoes, pace, distances, and this morning I basically needed a gurney to get me home. Here's how it went down:
Monday: Rocked out a 6 mile run like it's my job. Only walked about 1/4 mile about half way through. I am a self-proclaimed bad ass. Feel great all day.

Wednesday: Plan was to run 5, but we woke up to thunder, lightning, and sideways rain, thus skipping the said 5 miles in exchage for staying under the covers with the hubs.

Wednesday Night: have a giant dinner of steak kabobs, potatos, okra, and most importantly WINE with Neighbor Family. Very yummy dinner, not so yummy idea.

Today: awoke at 5:40am...I could feel it in my bones that today was not the day for another 6 miler. However, I have my committment to my running buddy and peeled myself out of my big cushy king sized bed to hit the open road.

Tom was snoring. As I'm leaving the room I kiss his head and say, "I'm leaving...love you hunny." He says, "Huh? Wuv. Wuvoo." Resumes snoring. How motivating.

Anyway, Bex (said running buddy) and I get to 2.06 miles and have to walk. Yes, you read that correctly. We were so exhausted at 2.06 miles we had to walk for a good 1/2 mile. A personal WORST for us. We are both already soaking wet and the air is stagnant and soooooo humid to the point that we are talking out loud to God begging for a breeze. Start back with a light jog, that is until we hit 3.55 miles. Walk again. Sad story, I know. Still soaked with sweat. Still no breeze.

The last 1/2 mile before we get home is the hardest. At this point I'm reciting Bible verses in my head because a.) I am trying to keep my mind off of the agony and b.) if I drop dead I figure it'll bode well for me to be thinking about Jesus while doing so. Luckily I did not drop dead, and lived to tell the story of the worst. 5 mile. run. in. history. When we got home Bex looked at her watch and said, "It took us the same amount of time to run 5 this morning as it did to run 6 on Monday." Terrible.

Moral of the story:
So what have we learned from the worst 5 mile run in history?
#1. No more potatos & wine before running mornings.
#2. Build up distance through the week...do not try 6 one day, and 6 the next when 6 is the farthest you've run. Don't try to be a rock star!
#3. Some days you're the Kenyan, some days you're the fat white girl who takes an hour and a half to run 5 miles.
Thus is life.